Q1-Father-God, I feel like I am dreaming my life away.  So much time has gone by… I am so sorry that I haven’t done more songwriting, or writing in general.  I am sorry that I don’t make time to learn how to create an app.  I am sorry that I wasted away the past 2 decades.  How am I still on track to do this dream if I don’t focus more, create more, and enjoy the process more.  I can’t wait forever to win the lottery.  I either need to start living my dreams out by creating something, or … or what?  or not live my purpose?  That would be to give up and just die.  No, I won’t give up.  Starting today, I will find the time.  I will do this thing.  Is this on your lead, Dad?

 

*** Mar,  you have done many things in the last 10 years:  You lost over 100  pounds, you managed a mental illness, survived near death many times, you took a recording studio/engineer classes (2 of them),  You took poetry classes , You learned basic guitar and ukelele, you wrote many poems, sang in the choir, journaled, you took classes on app making on udemy, you schemed with me, you laughed and cried with me, you loved me more and more each day, you love your husband and take care of him and manage your home, you keep a great heart and spirit in the light, you spiritually came around a 180 in our relationship, you came to know us, your love has grown exponentially, you are learning tennis, you are training for the 10K, you enjoy playing the harp, you have recorded over 10 songs and posted them on SoundCloud, you started a business, you successfully have many clients all over the midwest that you have worked with including one or two from the west coast, you have drive and endurance in this and to top it all off, you have the tenacity of a warrior in playing the lottery, believing every time that you will win and hope that maybe the day is today– you have put up with a lot of crap from the devil, you have met these challenges with love, laughter, mental strength of 10,000 men and you still have a heart of gold.  So, please don’t think that you have not gained ground in this journey; you have gone to hell and back transversing many lifetimes and are back to kick some Lucy-Butt!  You will be victorious if you stay close to the Holy Trinity and your Mother… the angels and saints and all your supporters.  You have many people that love you and are routing for you.  So, please remember this:  You will always be on the right path; when you don’t know where you are, just look to me.  I will be carrying you through it all.  I have you in the palm of my hand.  I love you, Mar.  Enjoy the ride… it’s just a valley you are going through.  Tomorrow is another day.  Write a song about this!  It will make you feel better.