Q1-Dad, I’m a little weary today. Could you give me the strength to get through all that I need to do for you today, this weekend, and next week? Then, next month will be very busy… I don’t know if I can keep going. I am really burnt out on my job. I want to spend the time to work on App Creations; I just don’t know what I’m doing and have so many questions… I just am weary. I thought I’d mention it to you to see if you have any suggestions or ideas. Can we turn the page on this chapter of my life, please? Do you still want me to play the lottery? I apologize for being so down. How ungrateful, I am sorry for my grumpiness.
***It’s actually rare of you to be feeling like this, so you really don’t need to apologize. I want you to be honest with me. I know your thoughts anyways, this way we can talk about it. You’ve been through a lot and your stamina and your tenacious playing is impressive… how many years has it been? Almost a decade now… So, I don’t think you need to apologize. I am happy that you have stayed with the plan even when you don’t see anything happening in the natural. Your spiritual antenna is sensitive enough to know that I wanted you to keep playing. You are doing great. Hang in there.
Yes, we can turn the page on this chapter soon. The suggestion I have for you is to focus on God and His goodness. Keep being thankful and focus on the fact that you are on the winning team. Focus on the fact that God will fight your battles. Rest in God. Your life will change completely when everything is ready, so enjoy your life as it is, because soon it will all change in ways that there will be no turning back. Are you sure you want to do this?
—Yes, Dad, I am all-in, ready, let’s rock and roll! I am 100% positive that I want to fight this fight for souls… it’s Game-on; I’m all in and excited to get going! Please have your way in my life. Show me what to do.
Ok, we just wanted confirmation on this. It’s going to be a fun ride.
Q2-Jesus, is it our turn? How many years ago was it when you called me and said, “It’s definitely our turn.” Did you forget me down here? I know time is different for you in eternity and a year is like a minute for you, but I am really exhausted. It’s been years- years and years. I’m getting old. I’m tired of this. Help me endure with patience. I’m sorry. I am so weary. Can you please ask Father to turn the page on this story? He will listen to you. Sweet Jesus, I love you, I want what you want — that is to win this battle. What do I need to do? Help me be strong. Give me what I need to wait patiently. Give me the winning ticket, so we can get off this chapter. This is one long painful chapter that seems to never end. What am I doing wrong? Have I let you down? Forgive me for my ungratefulness. I am so lucky to know you. That should be all I need, but I want so badly that all will know you, love you, and appreciate you… I feel like this chapter just needs to end. I’ve been through so much. People watch me at all times. They are laughing at me. They want me to lose and they want to see me cry. They hate me. They hate God and they want me to fail at my tests. It is all so involved. They see me shower, they know my thoughts. I know. I know what’s going on. I try to ignore it and say it’s my illness. I know better. I really know what’s going on. Sounds psychotic, I know. But I know more clearly that this is real. A true freaking weird movie like “The Truman Show” but only it’s my life and my fight. That’s ok. Whatever. Game on. Let’s get going. I don’t care if people can see me. Let them see my endurance, love, determination, my love for God, tenaciousness and let them see our victory!!! God’s Victory for souls! So, Jesus, is it our turn, please? Could you ask Father for me to please let me win the lottery? I don’t know how much more I can take. It only hurts when I think about it. Maybe I’ll just go for a run and listen to music today. That will make me forget all this. Whatever. You got this. Ok, I give up my desire for it. Whatever you guys want. Just give me the strength I need. Don’t let me miss my assigned destiny of helping usher in your Mighty and Holy Kingdom. That’s all I ask. Use me, Lord.
***Mar, you got this. You’re doing just fine. Thank you for pouring out your heart to me. This is how you fight. Your honesty will get you far. Don’t think that you need to be strong and silent in suffering. Share your thoughts with us and be honest with what you tell me. That is one great way to progress and heal. You feel better now, don’t you? (yes) Well, then, don’t forget that I want to bear your burdens. I want to help you get to where you need to be. I have given you the strength you’ve needed and I will help you always. Hang in there. You’re doing great. Don’t worry about what others think. They are either for you or they’re shaking in their boots afraid of you. You have nothing to worry about. God’s got this. I saw that… you rolled your eyes! Mar, seriously, you need to know and remember that God’s got this and if God’s is for you, who can be against you? I’ll tell you who can be against you… Losers. That’s who. So, you’re on the winning team and your running a great race. Guess what, Mar- you’re in the lead by a landslide! You’re way ahead in the game. It doesn’t look like it to you, but from my vantage point, you are ahead in this race by about 2 hours lead in a marathon. You sprinted right past them all and you’re in for the win… as long as you don’t give up. So, drink this cup of refreshing water here at the board meetings, get up and keep going! You’re almost at the finishing line for this race. This chapter and battle is just about to end. You’ve done well, my faithful daughter. Very well. Keep going. You’re doing fine. Take care of yourself.
Q3-Holy Spirit, I love you. Thank you for getting me here and for your lead. What would you like me to do today to get out of this funk? What can I do to shake this funk out of my day?
***Work your just 2 hours. Then play! Go for a run outside… put on your boots and bundle up… then go enjoy yourself. Go out tonight with DB to the Great Cover Up and enjoy the night. Eat raw. That will help your mood. Listen to some Bob Marley. Enjoy.
Q4-Mom, I love you so much… thank you for letting me be a part of the victory bash. I see us celebrating in the future with Lucifer chained for his thousand years. It will be a wonderful time of redemption, a healing for the people. When I think of how good it was of you to let me help in some small way, I am grateful. I apologize for complaining about this battle. I am so happy that you guys count me worthy to fight along with you. Can I stomp a little on the head of the serpent with you? It will be awesome to crush it along with you and the team. Sorry for whining about a little wait and complaining about people watching me. Whatever – there’s nothing exciting here to look at. I am at your service. Tell me what I need to do next. What’s the marching orders, mom?
***You make us smile, Mar. You’re service is appreciated. Your marching orders are to take one day at a time. Ready Set God! One day at a time. Don’t look back and don’t look forward in anticipation. That only brings sadness and frustration. Let’s go. Today. Now. Look here. What can you do today? Take care of yourself. Lots of produce run and train for the 10K. Work your designated hours. Do the best you can do. Pray. Enjoy your weekend! We love you! Take is easy. One day at the time.
Closing: I am glad I told you my grievance. I feel much better. I love you guys. I am so lucky to have you. Help me restrain myself… I just want to jump into this. You have a plan. Help me adjust myself to not run ahead. Thank you for your help. Please bless my day and help my family and friends be healthy, happy, and prosperous, in your will and love others. Xo, ~Amen.