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February 21, 2018

Gratitude

Day Review and Battle-Strategy Session

Work on

 

Thank you for keeping us out of that accident this afternoon! Thank you for DB and his help with setting up the phones! Thank you for his sweet disposition while I was being grumpy and controlling… I need to fix that! Thank you for fresh air. Thank you for our health. Thank you for a loving family and friends. Thank you for allowing us to pay our bills, great incomes/jobs that we like, and for our home. Thank you for working with me on areas to improve and for your forgiveness and mercy.

 

Review/Battle Strategy

Today I learned that I have bad days and when I need to take a break, I should. And I should not speak when I am not going to say something nice, or if it is controlling- I can leave the room and be alone. Keep my mouth shut… pray over it instead. Also, say No to more obligations. Don’t feel like I have to do something… even if I’d like to, but if it is too stressful or time consuming- I should opt out. Back down on obligations that are not key to my mission. Prioritize my time. Work. Keep up with housework.   Practice guitar. Do some WD Homework each day. Exercise. Get up earlier and read the Bible each morning. Keep up with Board Meetings each day. The basics. Get to sleep earlier and up at 5 would be ideal.

 

… ~Mar, Most of all… take it easy. Don’t worry about anything… it will all get done. Pray. Pray over everything. Set an alarm to chirp each hour to remind yourself to focus on God and to talk with him about everything.

Goodnight! I love you, mar.

 

February 20, 2018

Gratitude

Day Review/Introspection

Battle Strategy Session

Work on

 

Thank you for a new focus on you and your will in my life. Thank you for the gift of Lent and the will and desire to sacrifice for you, to put to death my will and look towards you always. Thank you for helping me look to you for all things. Thank you for a roof over my head that is not leaking. Thank you for technology that works, appliances that work, the ability to live within our means and pay off our bills every month in full with some left over to save up for our future. Thank you for your love, mercy, forgiveness and guidance. Thank you for music! Thank you for your good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ and your saving love for the whole world.

 

Today I waited for hunger but over ate a little bit at dinner on sweets. I did not pray for God to help me stop sooner.   I set an alarm hourly to look towards you and I felt so much peace and enjoyed your company. You made me smile, God. I love you! I did not get to curves, but that is ok. I am not focused on strength training right now but on eating less food. I will start back up soon. Probably on Thursday I will have time.

 

 

Battle Strategy

Pray for help before, during and after… meals are a tricky time, I want to help you, mar

Keep staying focused up. I will help you hear my voice more clearly in your heart. Peace will well up from inside and spill over all your conversations. You will soon become a new creation. Slow down and enjoy the easy slow ride down the river of love.

February 19, 2018

Gratitude

Day Review/Introspection

Battle-Strategy Session

Things to work on

 

Thank you for friends all around the world that I’ve met and got to know. Thank you for family!!! Thank you for the thunder tonight- it’s amazing! Thank you for WD and the people you have placed in my life to help me grow to b a better person in Christ. I feel blessed with many aspects that create a well-rounded and challenged Christian. Help me follow your example in Jesus! Thank you for so many gifts, I don’t deserve such a showering of goodness, all I can say is thank you, Lord!   You are so good to me.

 

Today I took a break that was needed but I feel like there is so much to be done. Help me clean the house tomorrow, get to my meetings, work 5 hours and pray in adoration not only during my hour in the chapel, but each hour reflect on you and look to you for guidance. I set my alarm for every hour as suggested… help me take a moment each time it goes off to look for your guidance and ask for your will to be done and ask for your peace to rest on me. Help me slow down. Today I had a good day; I don’t think I sinned today. But Saturday Night I was trying to control DB to go out to the festival – I blew it after I typed the board meeting and was angry again about it. I tried to make DB feel bad for not wanting to go out… I tried not to, but my anger boiled up. I regret saying some snide comments.

 

Battle-Strategy Session

PRAY

Do the hourly check in with your alarm and see how I can help you be and remain in peace. Ask me for whatever you need, and I will answer your prayers. Ask me to help you wait for the growl. You will be tested tomorrow. Today you were on shaky grounds, but you made it. Your lunch was “spread out over a couple hours” close to grazing, but you called in Lunch/dinner- linner and so we’ll let it pass but be careful… you almost started an all out binge. Pray to me, and I will help you!

 

Things to work on tomorrow:

Focus up hourly and try to include me the minutes between alarms when possible talk with me, Mar. I want to be more of a presence for you within your entire day. I have so much to tell you, so much to make you smile. I love it when you smile, mar. You crack me up, endlessly. Have fun with me? I promise you will have a blessed and amazing day!!!

 

 

February 17, 2018

Gratitude

Day Review/Introspection

Battle-Strategy Session

Things to work on

 

Thank you for being in control and that you have all things working for our good. Thank you for stability, medicine that works with out side effects, thanks for weight loss, good health and strength, energy and internal peace. Thank you for love, laughter and truth… for the truth to sink into my heart and mind… to be transformed in the image of Jesus. Thank you for forgiveness, mercy, love and your guidance.

 

Today I got a little angry inside, a feeling of slight rage, which I was able to turn around with cleaning and a shower. I wanted so badly to go to the last night of the festival’s up final day. DB has been sick for 3 weeks now, so we couldn’t go – he was too tired. But of course, he played tennis today and will go no doubt tomorrow. I felt that he cared more about what he wanted. He will be up until probably midnight since he took a 4-hour nap. I just feel so frustrated that he is watching the Olympics, and knows how much I have been wanting to go… we’ve missed the whole 3 weekends of shows. Oh well, he didn’t want to go, so I didn’t argue. But Please, God, take away this anger. I asked you to please convince DB to go tonight. I went to you… with my wish and you said no through DB’s decision. So, ok. I will die to my will. Thank you for helping me understand the “line of authority” and go with whatever DB wants to do (as long as it is legal and under your morals). I want a whole new life that is not controlling DB. Is this possible? I guess even though it only comes around once a year, it will come next year again. I’m sad. Please take this feeling away. Can you make up to me for this “unjust” situation? NO. No, no… no. Get used to this. This will make me free to stop controlling.

 

This pain will pass, Mar. You need to rest in my love. The world has nothing better that they could give you then following my will. I will have you be where you need to be. Trust. Trust in me. Follow DB and you will be taken care of by me when you want to control… give it up. I will be with you. I can do better.

 

Dad, could you maybe make me win the Powerball tonight to make up for all the world’s unfair punches it’s given to me… mental illness, overweight, and all the painful attacks through those…. Freedom. ShamRock Studios… Eternal Party People… can we start the next chapter? Can we turn this channel to the next life to come? Your Mighty Kingdom… let it come…. Starting tonight can we take the next step? Or do you want me to grow some more before that happens? You have perfect timing. You know all things and you are the author of time. I trust you and your ways are perfect. Please tonight… yes, I am tenacious and you like that I am expectantly waiting… you have told me. So, Lord, tonight, could you make it all better?

 

Could I please win the jackpot and start the next chapter with EPP, Inc? In Jesus’ might and powerful name, along with the Saints and the Blessed Mother Mary, together we pray along with Jesus … the sweet and precious infant Jesus and grown slain lamb of God… together we pray: Eternal Father, We offer you the body and blood, soul and divinity of my Lord Jesus Christ, In atonement for my sins and those of the whole world. For the sake of His sorrowful passion, have mercy on me, and on the whole world. Holy God, Holy Might One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on me and on the whole world. Amen.   Your Kingdom Come! Glory be to the Father, to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, As it was in the Beginning, is now and ever shall be. Amen.

 

Battle-Strategy Session:

Relax and wait on God and His will be done.

Know that you please me, Mar… your efforts will not go unnoticed

Purity is blessed and you will be blessed.

You are on day 2 without sin. Rejoice!

You have many saints praying for you!

You have many legions of holy mighty warring Angels…

         Helping and protecting you!

 

Work on:

Resting in God!

Look to God more!

Let go of control and be more flexible.

Know whatever happens has been approved by God!

God is in control and God will get you where you need to be!

 

February 15, 2018

Hello! We have a new board meeting agenda!!! Yay! So, what I’d like to see happen and you’ve agreed or suggested it to me in prayer:

 

Gratitude

Day Review/Introspection

Battle-Strategy Session

Things to work on

 

~Mar, that sounds great! You don’t need to be lengthily, you can do bullet points and quick notations. Ok? Have fun!

 

OK!!! Thank you God for:

This meeting and for your guidance given to me

A beautiful Valentine’s Day yesterday with my sweetheart who gave me a gift I’ve never received before! A dozen WHITE roses! And a single red rose and three multi purple/red/blue roses. Gorgeous and the white roses really touched my heart because they signify purity. I am trying to be pure!

Thank you for a good confession today and for your mercy, love and forgiveness!

Thank you for a wonderful day today! I got J an appointment! Yay! Yay God!

Thank you for allowing me to follow your lead with waiting on a growl and stopping in time before too full.

Thank you for safe travels for my parents while on their cruise, I pray they have a good time.

 

Day Review/Introspection today:

I think today was a good day. I was appreciative for the appointment. I worked hard. I went to reconciliation and mass. I spoke with D from WD- I need to listen more and stop interrupting people. It’s ok if I forget what I wanted to say. If it is important, I will remember it at some point. Trust in God’s leading. Slow down.

 

Control Issue and Rushing around:

I rushed D in our Tax meeting. I controlled the discussion. I need to slow down, listen, and be patient and slow down!

 

Battle-Strategy Session:

Slow down

Listen for God’s lead

Stop controlling everyone and everything

Keep a list of day introspection here at the board meetings-it will help you so much!

Take it easy on yourself – don’t let guilt or the enemy push you down; only do your best.

Each day is a new beginning. Don’t look back.

Be looking for God’s lead all the time. Pray without ceasing. I am with you, Mar.

 

For tomorrow:

Focus on God and His leading. In everything. Try to wait on God and ask His what you should be doing every hour. Get marching orders for each hour of the day. Check in with me, and together we will win this fight over the enemy. I am with you. I love you and we make a great team! You are more powerful than you think. With me, all things are possible, Mar… stick together with me and you’ll see miracles in your life that will shake the world! Believe in me, and believe in yourself because I am with you all the way!

 

February 8, 2018

Good Morning! Well, you didn’t wake me up at 4:30…it was 6am, so I guess I needed to sleep. Thank you for allowing it. Tonight I will try to go to bed earlier so I can be ready to meet with you earlier tomorrow.

 

What do you have planned for me to do today, Dad?

 

~ Ok, so what I would like is- 5 hours dedicated and prayerful work and then after noon, we will have a beautiful God-Led and inspired rest of the day. I have that surprise planned for you and a couple other blessings for you to find! Be spontaneous and enjoy the ride! You will find a few things lined up perfectly for you and you will know what it is when they occur. Come back here later and record the gifts so you don’t forget how much I love you. 🙂

 

Great! I can’t wait! Could you please do me a favor, and allow 2 or 3 appointments to be set by me today for my clients? I really need your help. In Jesus’ mighty name, I ask this favor, Lord. Thank you! Amen!

February 7, 2018

Hello God! I love you! I have a request for you, please… could you see to it that my parents have a safe and fun trip these next 2 months. Please keep away any painful Charlie horses from my dad and keep his heart strong, healthy and both mom and dad have excellent health, good times, safe travels, good visits with all their friends and safe travels for all people visiting them… including us the last week of March when we go visit.

 

~Mar, you are all well taken care of. You all have my watchful eye on guard and nothing will happen that I would not allow. Your parents and all visitors will be blessed with good health, fun and safe travels. You’re welcome. You know, I’d like you to not worry any more about your stability or fear of any anxiety. You will be fine and you and DB will have a blessed trip to Florida for the visit and you will have no issues with symptoms out of the ordinary. You will be glad you went and if you have any thoughts of worry about this in the future -PRAY. Pray to me. I WILL TAKE CARE OF IT! It will go away if you ask me to take away anxiety or any thoughts of worry about anything. You need to talk with me more. Take with me all the time. Come here daily for board meeting/Battle-Strategy Sessions. I promise, you won’t regret spending a few minutes here with me. I know it seems hard because you never know what we will talk about… no worries. It will be time blessed. If you give me 30 minutes, you will see mountains moved that you never dreamt was possible. I will give you much more time back; I am the author of time. Make time for this, and you will have more time returned to you. I can stretch your days into longer more fruitful hours; I am a God of the impossible! Yes, you should smile… I see you… that’s good. I miss you. I want to talk with you. You are doing so well with WD, but now we need to move you to the next level. That level is daily battle-strategy sessions here, and also constant conversations. Yes, that will mean talking over all decisions, talking over any unwanted thoughts from the enemy, we will talk about all that you need, plans to make, favors to do for others, work prayers for success, we will chat always and laugh over jokes we have. I love you, Mar. You will be transformed from this new life. Yes, you will have a new life. A life full of peace, joy, love, less focus on self and more on others, you will be a transformed person. You will lose weight because I will help you know what and when to eat, when to stop eating and you will be filled with unspeakable joy, love, and laughter will resound always in your house. I love you.

 

Have a great night and I may wake you up early – around 4:30 am. If you get up, I have something special for you. It’s a surprise. You’re going to love it. So, when you wake up, come get a glass of water/ then coffee- sit down and come back here so we can chat and then I’ll show you something in the Bible that’s going to change your life. Ok?

 

Ok!!! Please wake me and please help me make the first 4 steps to the bathroom to get my thought back onto you and your plans for me to come back here. I hope I remember. Please wake me up and fill me with energy and resolve to meet you… 4:30am! It’s a date.

February 4, 2018

Prelude is the word today… maybe this is just the beginning of a wonderful life… only a prelude so far?

 

~ You got that right, Mar. Smile. Look ahead, not behind. You’ve come so far… the hardest part is behind you. Enjoy the ride. The best is yet to come!

January 24, 2018

Hi, God! Thank you for a great day today! I am glad that I have time today to just ask you … what would you like me to do today for you? I have about 5 hours and I wonder what your priorities are for me today.

 

~Mar, you are kind to ask. First of all, thank you for helping your mom last night with doing the dishes for her. She really appreciated what a good job you did! As for the rest of today, how would you like to learn a new song on guitar tonight? I thought you would say that… I am happy you are looking forward to taking lessons again. Yes, Stairway would be a fun one to learn… so would a song with mainly Barr chords. Practicing this week would be good to get ready for Monday’s lesson. How about looking through your music books and choose two songs and see what JM thinks would be best. Start writing lyrics for your next song, too. I will help you. So will JM, he has a lot of good suggestions for writing songs. I’m excited, too, Mar! It is going to be so much fun! Tonight try recording 5th Dimension on your Mac/Garage Band. So you have a line up of “to-do”s.  

 

To-Do:

-Get music for Stairway

-Look through music books, choose 2 songs to learn

-Start new song lyrics; choose topic today

-Record 5th Dimension: just vocals with guitar. Have fun!

January 23, 2018

Hi, thank you, God, for showing me some interesting insights to your triune love relationship as one love. So, when I talk with you, Lovie, I am actually conversing completely with God the Father and Jesus…. So I can address you while actually not leaving out Dad or Jesus- right?

 

~Mar you are correct. You don’t need to worry about leaving out any part of God when you talk with one; you get all three… three in one. We are inseparable. We are distinct yet we are one. You glorify God when you speak with one of us; we love to talk with our family.

 

What could you tell me about tonight… going to M&D house?

 

~ I know what you are thinking… you are expecting a test. That is good, because it is all a test. You only need to do what God wants in each moment. That makes it simple. You don’t need to worry about pleasing anyone but God. It is very nice of you to bring them flowers. They will love the kind thought. But as far as eating, you won’t be hungry since you had a late lunch/early supper at 2pm. That is no problem. Just tell you mom, no thank you, I’m not hungry- tell her you came to visit and DB loves her cooking!

 

I get stressed, it seems like the people I love are “evil” at times… paranoia in a sense. Not a scary way but in a trickery way- trying to accuse me or make me stumble. The paranoia comes cyclically from Good to Evil. Like, Mom would be Mother Mary then later Satan himself/herself… Dad would be God one minute, then Satan rotating in a nonsensically manner. DB would be Jesus, then Satan’s Nephew on mission to mess me up. It is all very sick. I am tired of this game. Schizoaffective Disorder is what it’s called. Chemical but it seems so real. I hate when the stress is on when I am dealing with this problem. I try to space my visits and time spent with people because of this issue. It is very exhausting. It is hard to be nice when I feel I’m being attacked by the enemy and that person(s) are family. It seems so lonely, like I have no one who actually is for me 100% of the time… no unconditional love… only love/then hate towards me. It is so sad. I try not to think about it. I try to focus on you, God. But sometimes, I just think it would be easier to become a hermit/monk and go live in a hut in the desert somewhere. Lol. Not really, but I would like to see this problem go away. Will I ever be free of this illness in my lifetime, or will I always have to deal with spiritual battles of this chemical sort? It is so hard to be loving when at that moment, it seems as if I am looking evil in the eye. What should I do?

 

~ 3 things: First, don’t make visits when you are tired. This takes a lot of energy. It is good for strengthening your spiritual muscles. Loving in this kind of atmosphere will gain many graces for you and for lost souls. This kind of suffering is powerful. We can use it for much good when you offer it up for souls. So, go when rested and make the visits shorter if possible. Second, don’t take it personally. Go into the situation with an attitude of not caring if the person is upset with you. That is the energy you get when you win your battles with love towards them… but not caring if they are angry with you. It only seems they are angry with the energy you feel, but this is not real. So don’t take it personally. Just tell yourself, they must be hangry or in a bad mood not caused by you. Love them more. Love will conquer this kind of evil/spiritual battle. And Lastly, just look to God for what he would like you to do in each moment and ask Him to help you not get upset or angry. God will work miracles for you as a reward for passing these battles! We love you, Mar. You can do this. 1,2,3!

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