Q1- Thank you for weekends! You are so good to us, I have a hard time wrapping my brain around your goodness! I’m looking forward to the neighborhood potluck this afternoon… please help me relax and have a good time. I’m excited to meet everyone for the first time. Please, don’t let me worry about saying the wrong thing, and help me listen more and not blab on and on. Please help me remember names and their faces. I have a difficult time remembering names and for some reason, the faces don’t even trigger how I know people. I think I’m a little challenged in this area. It’s not that I don’t care; it’s that I just don’t remember much about all types of things!
Answer, Q1- Don’t worry about anything. Just know that you are loved by God Almighty and that is all that matters. Have fun talking with people and try to be a good listener. If you think of things to say while another is talking, just wait and listen to them until a break and if it is worth saying, you will remember what it was you wanted to share. If not, don’t worry about it- it doesn’t matter if you forget what you wanted to say. Ok? I will help you remember the names, don’t worry about anything. With all things, look to me and my approval and you will see that you don’t need to worry about what other people think. Also, most people have a difficult time remembering names and connecting that to their face. It’s a common problem, so don’t ever feel badly when you have a problem with this.
Q2- I’m thinking about taking the poetry class that is being offered in November. It is specifically about telling a story or stories in poetry. I think it would be a great class being offered by PC and T. What story should I tell?
I have so many wild stories to tell. One I think most about is the time I had a manic episode and ran off. I ended up in the Salvation Army shelter when it was 110 degrees outside and wanted to get in the car to drive to Chicago with another girl at the shelter. How you saved me from homelessness. How you helped DB find me and save me from a bleak future alone in Chicago with a mind broken from mental illness.
Or how I’ve escaped danger and death several times. My angels saved me from car accidents, a ski accident, the college parties that were dangerously populated by satanic worshipers with evil intent on harming people – out in the desert… students were disappearing. I remember you saved me from rape on 2 accounts. So many stories when I look back, it’s a miracle that I am alive.
Or I could tell my story about you and how I am so confused with the illness when it seems as if you are not only my Heavenly Father, God Almighty but my paternal father, my dad – the one I know so well- that somehow the two of you are the same. That God has come down to earth in the form of my dad but that he is not only God, but sometimes he is rotating between evil and then back to Father God… yes, It is a difficult to live with a broken mind. It is painful, frustrating and very tiresome to not know what kind of person people will be… Good or Bad rotating within my family and friends, and apparently to most of the people I know. It brings some serious confusion and is extremely tiresome. I just accept it, though, and try to ignore the bad and appreciate the good when it comes around. It always does.
Or, I could tell my story about the time I felt like I was going down into the dark depths of hell and how when I called out to Jesus, I was saved and brought back to awaken in the hotel room we were temporarily staying at that night. (DB brought me there in hopes that the next day, he could get me admitted to the hospital.)
Answer, Q2- I am so sorry that you have been through so much! It sounds like you could do many story-telling poems, but I encourage you to not focus on the bad. When you write your story in poetry, focus on all the good that has come out of your experience.
You could write about the visions I’ve given you, or you could write about the love you have in DB. You could write the story about the love of Jesus that you know so well. You could write the story of answered prayer that you know so well. You could write the story about your childhood and how it led you to being the person you are now… still child-like and goofy… tell why your heart is not hardened from all you’ve been through with all of your life’s difficulties. You could write the story about heaven coming down to earth one day soon and that the veil is being slowly lifted… you could share why you think that is the case now. You could write so many beautiful stories. Do not bring more sadness and hopelessness but shine your light in the darkness. Do it for me, Mar?